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Thread: Something my girlfriend sent me...

  1. #1
    Super MURCer Paddy's Avatar
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    Exclamation Something my girlfriend sent me...



    Element Name: WOMAN Symbol: WO

    Atomic Weight: (don't even go there)

    Physical properties: Generally round in form. Boils at nothing and may
    freeze at any time. Melts when ever treated properly. Very bitter if
    mishandled.

    Chemical Properties: Very active. Highly unstable. Possesses strong
    affinity with gold, silver, platinum, and precious stones. Volatile when
    left alone. Able to absorb great amounts of exotic food. Turns slightly
    green when placed next to a shinier specimen.

    Usage: Highly ornamental. An extremely good catalyst for dispersion of
    wealth. Probably the most powerful income reducing agent known.



    Caution: Highly explosive in inexperienced hands.



    ------------------------------------------------------------------

    Element Name: MAN Symbol: XY

    Atomic Weight: (180 +/-50)

    Physical Properties: Solid at room temperature, but gets bent out of
    shape easily. Fairly dense and sometimes flaky. Difficult to find a pure
    sample. Due to rust, aging samples are unable to conduct electricity as
    easily as young samples.

    Chemical properties: Attempts to bond with WO any chance it can get.
    Also tends to form strong bonds with itself. Becomes explosive when
    mixed with KD (Element: Child) for prolonged period of time. Neutralize
    by saturating with alcohol.

    Usage: None known. Possibly good methane source. Good specimens are
    able to produce large quantities on command.

    Caution: In the absence of WO, this element rapidly decomposes and
    begins to smell.

  2. #2
    Super MURCer SCompRacer's Avatar
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    Post

    Is this like an MSDS sheet that goes in your Haz Mat book?

  3. #3
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    Question

    ?

  4. #4
    Super MURCer SCompRacer's Avatar
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    Material Safety Data Sheet. Goes in the Right To Know book of Hazardous Materials.

    Something to refer to in the workplace to gain knowledge of hazardous materials for safe handling. Required by OSHA (Occupational Safety & Health Administration), a US goverment agency.

    ---------------------------------------------
    This third shift person has been up way too many hours.

  5. #5
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    Lightbulb

    doh!
    (too little caffine today!)

  6. #6
    Super MURCer SCompRacer's Avatar
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    Too much! How else am I going to get everything done today? Just real easy to get off task right now. Am DL'ing files to fix an HP PC for someone.

    The MSDS thing would get a few laughs here though.

  7. #7
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    Thumbs down

    I have just missed another lecture becasue i spent too long on the computers!

  8. #8
    Super MURCer SCompRacer's Avatar
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    Exclamation

    Say, thats not good. How are you, a medical student, going to know what you missed?

    --------------------------------------------
    Forgot to say that what your girlfriend sent you is humurous. I did not get it was a joke at first cause it was so accurate!

    [This message has been edited by SCompRacer (edited 25 May 2000).]

  9. #9
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    I think the lecture is on fetal malformations (the problem is that i have left my bag in the lecture theater - so i cant go home!).

  10. #10

    Question

    With other words, she might be pregnant or not, or never can be, Pat?

  11. #11
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    Smile

    I think it's very funny... going to e-mail this one around my adressbook and spam the world!

    ahum

    To WHOM it may concern:



    ------------------
    In case it's a harware problem:
    PIII-500, 256 MB, G400 MAX DH on, ABIT BH6, MX300
    Win2K drivers: 5.03



  12. #12

    Arrow

    Nice one Patrick

    (I still hate the thing though, and my teacher makes me hate it more)

  13. #13
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    Arrow

    plenty more crap where that came from!

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