For all of the British Car Enthusiasts:

[MultimediaMan]

Did you hear the one about the guy that peeked into a Land Rover and asked the owner "How can you tell one switch from another at night? They all look the same. " - "He replied, "It does not matter which one you use, nothing happens !"

The Lucas motto: "Get home before dark."

Lucas is the patent holder for the short circuit.

Lucas - Inventor of the first intermittent wiper.

Lucas - Inventor of the self-dimming headlamp.

The three position Lucas switch - Dim, Flicker and Off.

The Original Anti-Theft Device - Lucas Electrics.

LUCAS is an acronym for Loose Unsoldered Connections and Splices

Lucas systems actually use AC current; it's just at a random frequency.

"I have had a Lucas pacemaker for years and have never had any trou..."

If Lucas made guns, wars would not start.

A friend of mine told everybody he never had any electric problems with his Lucas equipment. Today he lives in the countryside, in a large manor with lots of friendly servants around him and an occasional ice cold shower...

Back in the 70's, Lucas decided to diversify its product line and began manufacturing vacuum cleaners. It was the only product they offered which did not suck.

Q: Why do the British drink warm beer? A: Because Lucas makes their refrigerators

Alexander Graham Bell invented the Telephone.Thomas Edison invented the Light Bulb. Joseph Lucas invented the Short Circuit.

Recommended procedure before taking on a repair of Lucas equipment: Check the position of the stars,kill a chicken and walk three times clockwise around your car chanting:" Oh mighty Prince of Darkness protect your unworthy servant..."

[Dr Mordrid]

Was the owner of a Triumph Spitfire, Triumph TR3, MG Midget and an MGB, most of them used road and track, so I fully understand.

[KRSESQ]

An old friend of mine had an old MGB (for all I know he still does). I think he replaced every part in the thing that could be replaced and he STILL couldn't get it running.

Kevin

[Dr Mordrid]

Best thing to do with Triimphs or MG's is replace every wire from key to spark plugs with something water-resistant, replace the SU or Zenith Stromberg's with Webers, add an electric fuel pump and add a high voltage electronic ignition. I did that with mine and they'd start and run first time, every time. Of course back then getting an electronic ignition meant building your own from a circuit in Popular Electronics, but it worked great.

[KRSESQ]

He was a real "original condition" nut.

Of course, this is the same guy who shoehorned a 351 Cleveland into a 1974 Mustang II. Had to completely chop out the wheel wells to route the headers.

Kevin

[Dr Mordrid]

Doesn't mean you can't keep the off-hardware for later restoration, it just prevents you from having to use ether every time you start the SOB I had a Mustang II as well, but rebuilt the V6 that was in it from the ground up and added a beefed up drive line. Nice once finished.

[Evildead666]

A good friend of mine restored a Spitfire, and broke down 15kms away from home on its first outing

great car tho...

[Technoid]

Lucas, he invented darkness. (rough translation of what we say about it here in sweden)

[TransformX]

Recommended procedure before taking on a repair of Lucas equipment: Check the position of the stars,kill a chicken and walk three times clockwise around your car chanting:" Oh mighty Prince of Darkness protect your unworthy servant..."

ROFLMAO!!!

[Brian Ellis]

It is many, many years since I had a car with Lucas electrics, thank God! I agree that Lucas produced rubbish; I had many breakdowns because of Lucas, probably >90% of them. One car I had had about 10 functions on one stalk (lights, blinkers, dipping, horn, wipers, windscreen washer etc.). The whole thing was in diecast zinc. One day, about to make a turn, I pressed the stalk down normally and the diecasting broke at the root, just inside the steering column cowling. Al the lights came on full beam, the horn sounded and wipers started with washer water. The only thing I could do was disconnect the battery, call for help and have it towed away. The dealer for that make didn't have a spare so went to the local Lucas depot, who didn't have one, either. Car 2 weeks off the road, then the mechanic took 3 hours to fit the new one, nice hefty bill. And this was a popular make and <2 y.o.

The only electrical fault I've had in >40 year motoring with Japanese cars was one wiper motor on a Corona. I stopped at first Toyota garage: new motor fitted in 30 minutes, free-of-charge (3 year guarantee). I expressed surprise that a rural garage stocked a spare motor. The guy took me downstairs into his store room, about 500 m², full of tightly-packed shelves with spares for every Toyota model. He explained that a good spares inventory was part of his contract with the importers, without which he would not get the franchise as sole Toyota dealer in a given area.

[Dr Mordrid]

Had two car fires since getting my license at 12 (48 years of driving so far):

1. SU carb in my first Spitfire generated a leak and the engine caught fire. Totaled.

2. Toyota Celica's dash caught fire due to a short in the wiring harness. Totaled.

[Wulfman]

no fire extinguisher for the 2nd one? sounds like it could have been saved.

mfg
wulfman

[Dr Mordrid]

Had one, but that dash went up like crazy with loads of toxic fumes - no time to do much but get the hell out of Dodge.

[cjolley]

Had one, but that dash went up like crazy with loads of toxic fumes - no time to do much but get the hell out of Dodge.

I thought you said it was a Toyota.


PS Sorry, couldn't help it.