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  • Ha!

    The 1st part is a girl's apology email for cheating.

    2nd is his hilarious reply which was forwarded to HIS entire address book
    and is now circulating everywhere.

    Brad,

    It would be difficult for me to be any more miserable right now, I feel
    like the worst person ever. First, let me start by saying that I am truly
    truly sorry, and I hate myself for hurting you. Of all the people in the
    whole entire world, you were honestly the last person that I would ever
    want to wrong in any way. There is no excuse at all or anything that
    happened, so I won't even try other than to say all of us had WAY too much
    to drink, and I did a stupid thing. I can handle you being p1ssed at me, I
    absolutely deserve it, I can even handle the ugly words that were
    exchanged between us, what I can't handle is thinking that you see me as a
    different person. It is weird, The world looked funny yesterday, I
    couldn't crack a smile if you paid me, there are songs I can't listen to,
    and I just feel beyond crushed. I don't know if you meant everything you
    said to me, and I am hoping that you didn't. I know that I was wrong on
    many levels, but I am also hoping that this is something that we can deal
    with. I know it sounds totally crazy and stupid, I can't imagine my days
    without you. It is totally strange and weird to say that, and you could
    say that my behavior didn't reflect that, and you would be correct. I hate
    feeling like you hate me, and I hate feeling like all of your friends
    think I am a terrible person, because I am not. I know there is nothing I
    can say or do to take back what happened.
    I am so sorry.

    Elizabeth


    RESPONSE:

    Dear Elizabeth,

    Thank you for your concern. I'll be sure to file it away under "L" for
    "Long-winded diatribes from drunken whores I couldn't care less about".

    You did a stupid thing huh? No...doing long division and forgetting to
    carry the one is "a stupid thing"; Mixing in a red sock with a load of
    whites is "a stupid thing"; Blowing some guy in a bathroom for 45minutes
    while I sit at the bar wondering if you're taking so long because you ate
    too much bran that morning isn't as much a "Stupid thing" as it is grounds
    for permanent removal from my social calendar.

    To be honest, I'm not sure if it was more amusing that you went and
    degraded yourself in a public toilet not once but twice in a 2 hour span,
    or that you seemed to think that by saying "Well, I didn't F**k him"
    somehow gave you a clean slate. So forgive me if I couldn't care less if
    the world "looked funny" to you yesterday. Since your world revolves
    around blow dryers, golden retrievers, Prada Bags and Jelly Beans, I'm
    sure it must have been most unsettling to actually have to consider
    someone else's feelings for 24 hours straight. The good news for you is
    that my friends don't think you're a terrible person, they just think
    you're the average run of the mill cum-guzzling blond who commands about
    as much respect as your average child porn collector.

    By the way, for the amount of time you claim to spend in spin class you
    really must be doing something wrong to sport the thunder thighs you do.
    Watching you parade around my bedroom in a thong was a little like
    watching sea lions mate. Thought you might like to know.

    PS. I forwarded about 100 people on this email.

    Talk to you never,

    Brad
    Lawrence

  • #2
    first!

    /meow
    Intel Core 2 Quad Q6600
    Asus Striker ][
    8GB Corsair XMS2 DDR2 800 (4x2GB)
    Asus EN8800GT 512MB x2(SLI)

    I am C4tX0r, hear me mew!

    Comment


    • #3
      So this guy must like blonds with thunder thighs lol

      Comment


      • #4
        Funny

        But probably fake...

        Fellow exacts revenge on cheating girlfriend by broadcasting her apologetic e-mail and his reply to it?
        Ladies and gentlemen, take my advice, pull down your pants and slide on the ice.

        Comment


        • #5
          "I like big butts and I cannot lie ...."
          Yup, you reduced me to quoting Sir Mix-A-Lot.
          Originally posted by Gurm
          .. some very fair skinned women just have a nasty brown crack no matter what...

          Comment


          • #6
            I preffer Freddy Mercury and Queen's cushion pushin gem:
            "Fat bottomed girls, you make this rockin world go 'round!"

            Or Spinal Tap's
            "Big bottom, big bottom
            Talk about bum cakes, my girl's got 'em
            Big bottom drive me out of my mind
            How could I leave this behind?"
            Core2 Duo E7500 2.93, Asus P5Q Pro Turbo, 4gig 1066 DDR2, 1gig Asus ENGTS250, SB X-Fi Gamer ,WD Caviar Black 1tb, Plextor PX-880SA, Dual Samsung 2494s

            Comment

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