View Full Version : Top 20 Things that Never Happen on Star Trek

13th November 2006, 01:04
20 - Most things that are new or in some way unexpected.

19 - Spock (or Data) is fired from his high-ranking position for not being able to understand the most basic nuances of about one in three sentences that anyone says to him.

18 - Wesley Crusher gets beaten up by his classmates for being a smarmy git, and consequently has a go at making some friends of his own age for a change.

17 - The warp engines start playing up a bit, but seem to sort themselves out after a while without any intervention from boy genius Wesley Crusher.

16 - Counsellor Troi states something other than the blindingly obvious.

15 - The Enterprise successfully ferries an alien VIP from one place to another without a serious incident.

14 - Kirk (or Riker) falls in love with a woman on a planet he visits, and isn't tragically separated from her at the end of the episode.

13 - The Enterprise visits an earth-type planet called "Paradise" where everyone is happy all of the time. However, everything is soon revealed to be exactly what it seems.

12 - The Enterprise is captured by a vastly inferior alien intelligence which they easily pacify by offering it some sweeties.

11 - The Enterprise is captured by a vastly superior alien intelligence which does not put them on trial.

10 - The Enterprise runs into a energy field of a type it has encountered several times before.

9 - The Enterprise goes to visit a remote outpost of scientists, who are all perfectly alright.

8 - Some of the crew visits the holodeck and it works properly.

7 - The crew of the Enterprise discovers a totally new lifeform, which later turns out to be a rather well-known old life-form wearing a funny hat.

6 - The crew of the Enterprise is afflicted by a mysterious plague, for which the only cure can be found in the well-stocked enterpise sick bay.

5 - The captain has to make a difficult decision about a less advanced people which is made a great deal easier by the Starfleet Prime Directive.

4 - An enigmatic being composed of pure energy attempts to interface with the Enterprise's computer, only to find it has forgotten to bring the right leads.

3 - A power surge on the bridge is rapidly and correctly diagnosed as a faulty capacitor by the highly trained and competent engineering staff.

2 - A major Starfleet emergency breaks out near the Enterprise, but fortunately some other ships in the area are able to deal with it to everyone's satisfaction.

1 - The Enterprise is involved in a bizarre time-warp experience which is in some way unconnected to the late 20th century.

13th November 2006, 15:20
7 - The crew of the Enterprise discovers a totally new lifeform, which later turns out to be a rather well-known old life-form wearing a funny hat.


13th November 2006, 16:27

13th November 2006, 16:42
If you took all those 20 things, you could probably make one or two of the most boring episodes ever.

13th November 2006, 20:27
No, you could actually make GOOD episodes out of them: Life is full of terrible things that didn't happen, and Star Trek's plots over the past 40 years have been so formulaic as to be laughably predictable. You just need good writers who are not throttled by their producers.

This, in all honesty, isn't really all the Star Trek's creator's fault...many many other successful series were based on the premise of a "series of short stories within a season" rather than one ongoing developing story - Epochs were defined at the beginning and ending of seasonal runs; this was by design...it made most series true "Random Serials" except for the odd two-or-three part Special and made syndication an easy transition.

The trouble with newer Star Trek series was the "Unknown Energy 'Whatever'" was such an over-used plot device... An experienced Trekkie or Trekker could sense one coming a parsec away. At the rate the show discovered new energy forms, new physical laws, and the odd infectious disease we should have had "LaForge's Constant", "Data's Number", "Picard's Factor", and energy units measured in "Wesley's", "Troi's", and a medical term called "Crusher's Choice"...

Fortunately, it seems like TV Producers are starting to see the light: People LIKE complex multi-part plot lines which often take bizarre turns. The other extreme of course is Reality TV: which fortunately, is dying a well-deserved death.

14th November 2006, 04:25
You know, I've never seen a crewmember going to the little-crewmembers-room (or even hinting at this). Nor have I seen signs in the hallway... :confused:


14th November 2006, 06:57
they probably have the waste material beamed out of them automatically by the computer ;)

14th November 2006, 12:37
You know, I've never seen a crewmember going to the little-crewmembers-room (or even hinting at this). Nor have I seen signs in the hallway... :confused:


According to the technical manual, yes I use to have the book and CD, there was a Captain's head right off the bridge. And in the episode with the future Riker (not Thomas) they came in and he was not there for a brief moment making commander Riker look foolish and he comes out of a room adjusting his shirt.

15th November 2006, 02:10

15th November 2006, 11:29
bwhahaha !!! :laugh:

Data trying to decipher the 21st century Windows OS. :D

15th November 2006, 14:35

ROFLMAO! :classic: :laugh: :p :bunny:

15th November 2006, 15:44

I'm going to be saving that animated gif for a LONG time.

15th November 2006, 15:47

Reminds me of this one for some reason ;) :D

Jon P. Inghram
15th November 2006, 16:40

LMAO! :D :up:

17th November 2006, 08:43
Yep :)

17th November 2006, 13:04
Strange thing like the Borg who always want to assimulate earth fail to advantage of the Dominian war.

Or once how come seven of nine didn't manage to get the nano probes once Voyager had made the new weapons. She could crack any computer security so she could have found the information and transmitted it to the collective once she regained contact.