View Full Version : The Registry of Obscene Names

2nd March 2004, 19:40
Alright, let's get a compendium going of all those names that just sound wrong. ;) Reply with a single name.. accolades if it's one of your own invention. I'll start with a classic..

Mike Hunt :)

2nd March 2004, 19:40
Ivan Joyderpuss

(not my own)

2nd March 2004, 19:41
Mike Oxbig

2nd March 2004, 19:42
Randy Ho

(afaik, it's my own invention. :) )

2nd March 2004, 19:49
Philip McCavity

2nd March 2004, 19:57
Harry Sphincter

2nd March 2004, 20:08
Liqin Dong

This is a real name of an employee at my work and she pronounces that way too.

2nd March 2004, 20:10
Harry Pitts

btw, how does she deal with constantly being Liqin Dong? :D

2nd March 2004, 20:17
How about..
Hugh Jass

2nd March 2004, 20:19
Good one.. and his Grandpa in the old country was called..

Hugh Jasso

2nd March 2004, 20:37
Originally posted by KvHagedorn
Harry Pitts

btw, how does she deal with constantly being Liqin Dong? :D

My theory....she has no idea what liqin dong means. I don't think anyone has told her. I mean, the first time I heard it, I about choked on my water.

I was sitting in class, she got up to speak and said, "Good morning, my name is liqin dong and I'll be teaching about...."


Oh, and one other good story about her name. I was in a meeting. My co-worker sitting next to me. I grabbed his laptop and typed her name in the company directory. I slid the laptop back over to him. He stared at the screen for a few seconds. Suddenly he just lost it. I didn't expect that reaction out of him so I lost it. We both proceeded to jiggle without making a sound. I had tears literally squirting out of my eyes. If someone had told me that I would have made it through that meeting without laughing, I would have called them a liar. After what seemed like several minutes, I left the room to go compose myself. Upon my return, I couldn't look at my co-worker thw whole meeting. I was having a hard enough time just being in the same room. Man, that plan backfired!

Jon P. Inghram
2nd March 2004, 20:55
I'm still waiting for Depends to become Dick Trickle's main sponsor in NASCAR. :)

2nd March 2004, 21:16
Back when I was in tech support, we had a customer named Phong Kew.

Similarly, my brother had a TA in university named Phoque Woo.

If it was me, once I realized the alternate meaning of my name, I'd just respond to "what's your name?" with "Uh... you can call me Bob" :)

2nd March 2004, 23:08
Remember Long Duk Dong from the movie Sixteen Candles? :D

No wonder so many Asians get Anglicized names when they move here.

Oh well, to continue, one of Bart Simpson's favorites:

Mike Rotch

3rd March 2004, 00:42
And another one from Bart Simpson:
Ivana Tinkle

edit: Here is a list of those used in The Simpons: http://www.snpp.com/guides/moe_calls.html

3rd March 2004, 01:18
Dave, if you want to be especially mean to this woman, sneak into her office/cubicle and put onto her computer a fullscreen-sized video of some woman licking a penis. Dub a voiceover saying "Hey, are you liqin dong?" followed by laughter. Make her open it by rerouting, say, her "Word" or "Excel" icon to open the video clip instead. :D

Jeez, I'm evil.. the poor woman would probably go to the top floor and jump off. :eek:

3rd March 2004, 03:40
I.C. Wiener

(Futurama inside :D)

3rd March 2004, 04:19
Peter Silie

3rd March 2004, 05:15
Theres a chain of Convence stores in New Jersey Called Wawa and the guy who runs it name is

Dick Wood :p

I had to restrain myself so my coffee didnt go out my nose when I saw that on the coffee cup I got from there a couple years ago

3rd March 2004, 05:28
There was a politician in New South Wales here in Australia whose name was Richard Face. (geez his parents must of hated the idea of having a child... :))

3rd March 2004, 05:32
Richard Hedd.

"Just call me Dick!"

- Gurm

3rd March 2004, 06:12
ok dick.

3rd March 2004, 06:46
Bigus Dicus.. :D

no but seriously some names in english or other languages sound horible when translated to arabic

NiKita Balakhov = bone her with out feer
Jan-pier Masklie = Jan-Pier Held my thingy
Monika Luinsky = (when done with a syrian accent = he did not bone winski)

and quite alot of other similar ones.....

4th March 2004, 07:23
Hmm. Did not read whole thread.

5th March 2004, 17:19
Nobody has mentioned the classic..

Hugh G. Rection

What about the rest of the Ho family? We met Randy, how about

Ima Ho


Harry Ho

5th March 2004, 17:28
There's the Butt family (there's a chain of grocery stores in Texas called H.E.B., which stands for Howard E. Butt, though everyone thought it was

Harry Butt

for a long time. There were stories about his family, too.. that he had a daughter named

Ophelia Butt

and a son named

Tanner Butt

but neither of these were confirmed.) :)

7th March 2004, 08:13
We have/had a weather girl here whose name was Maxi Biewer (pronounced like "beaver").


7th March 2004, 12:10
I knew a guy (he was Creek Indian) whose last name was actually Beaver. I bet he's glad his parents didn't name him Harry. :)

So let's add the Beaver family..

Harry Beaver

Randy Beaver

Ophelia Beaver

Liqin Beaver (Thanks, Dave.. never knew that name existed! :) )

Ivana Beaver

Misty Beaver

Lotta Beaver

any others? :D

7th March 2004, 16:14
For guys:

One of my best friends at school... Peter Du.
So, on the school network, his login is... du peter :D

Another friend of mine, with first name... Yen.
So, we often joke that hes worth 1 Yen :D

For gals:

I met a few chinese girls before with their first name:
Sounds yummy to me! (jk)

And I know this other girl whose name is
Sincere. (on letter, you'd go like... Sincererly, sincere)

What's up with these nams :? geez.