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  • Political humor.....

    From EVote;

    Man's Best Friend

    First Lady Laura Bush says she's decorating the White House Christmas Tree this year with images of the many pets who lived in the White House over the years. Some of the ornaments in the works will represent FDR's dog, John Quincy Adams' pet alligator, and from Bill Clinton's era - the Washington Press Corps.

    Polar Opposites

    Senator Tom Daschle lit up the talk radio circuit this week when he blamed it for "shrill" rhetoric that makes people threaten the lives of politicians. Daschle went on to point out that people who watch conventional outlets like the network news never want to kill anybody but themselves.

    The Old Bait And Switch

    The INS was unable to locate about 1,800 immigrants it had hoped to interview after September 11th. Officials are confident they'll all be located soon though, citing their sophisticated new tracking system - one agent puts a government check on the sidewalk, the other one hides in some nearby bushes with a net.

    A Day At The Beach

    Environmentalists are outraged by a new White House plan to allow gas drilling near the nesting grounds of endangered sea turtles near South Padre Island, Texas. In other news, the bush administration announced this week that to save oil and fight global warming, it's working on a new car engine that runs entirely on turtles.

    Institutional Bias

    Some former Americorps members are upset with a proposed new pledge for incoming recruits because it includes the term "so help me God" and because it refers to upholding the Constitution. White House officials say they're willing to compromise on the new pledge, but at the very least, they insist that the term "screw the Republicans" has to be removed from the current pledge once and for all.

    The Wrong Idea

    The Bush administration is asking allies in other countries to contribute more materials to help the war on terrorism. Some of the countries still haven't gotten the message though. For example, all the Germans have pledged to send so far is fifty new terrorists.

    The Abominable Snowman

    Linda Tripp is helping to open a new year-round Christmas store in Middleburg, Virginia. Owners of the store are said to be re-thinking the deal though, explaining that they had been looking for someone that reminds people of SANTA - not Satan.

    Fringe Benefits

    FCC officials are looking into a number of complaints that they received about this week's televised Victoria's Secret fashion show. Commissioners report that they plan to issue new TV decency standards, but only after "months and months of carefully reviewing the evidence in question."

    The Classics

    Al Gore and his wife Tipper have been on a national tour promoting their new book about the American family. When asked why he wanted to spend weeks on the road plugging his new book, Gore replied that "it sure as hell beats having to stay home plugging Tipper..."

    The Meek, The Overtaxed, The Canadians

    The Prime Minister of Canada, Jean Chretien, made news this week for allegedly calling President Bush a "moron." Chretien later apologized for the slip, explaining that without its sense of intellectual self-righteousness, Canada would soon wither and cease to exist as a nation

    Dr. Mordrid
    Last edited by Dr Mordrid; 25 November 2002, 09:59.
    Dr. Mordrid
    ----------------------------
    An elephant is a mouse built to government specifications.

    I carry a gun because I can't throw a rock 1,250 fps

  • #2
    Funny stuff, but a minor correction to the last one. It wasn't Jean Chretien who called Bush a moron, it was one of his aides, in a private conversation.
    Lady, people aren't chocolates. Do you know what they are mostly? Bastards. Bastard coated bastards with bastard filling. But I don't find them half as annoying as I find naive, bubble-headed optimists who walk around vomiting sunshine. -- Dr. Perry Cox

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    • #3
      Ya but I'm sure Cretien agreed and they all had a good laugh though.
      #1 DRILL SERGEANT PICK-UP LINE

      "You make me hornier before 9 AM than most
      people do all day!"

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      • #4
        An under-secretary called him a "moron", but usually they don't parrort something like that unless they heard the boss say it first.

        Dr. Mordrid
        Dr. Mordrid
        ----------------------------
        An elephant is a mouse built to government specifications.

        I carry a gun because I can't throw a rock 1,250 fps

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        • #5
          Didn't I hear on the news this morning that the person that said that has just resigned?
          DM says: Crunch with Matrox Users@ClimatePrediction.net

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          • #6
            TWO of them resigned. The first one got hammered then another repeated her mistake. So much for Canadians being smart

            Dr. Mordrid
            Dr. Mordrid
            ----------------------------
            An elephant is a mouse built to government specifications.

            I carry a gun because I can't throw a rock 1,250 fps

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            • #7
              Dr Mordrid I think you mean Canadian Politicians.

              jeebee
              Personally, I think that Cretien is doing a great job and I wish he'd be back another term but it looks doubtful. He's the best we've had in a long long time if you ask me.

              Who wants a straight laced PM or Prez anyway. Cretien's down to earth. I rather a PM that does a face plant playing basket ball. It's things you can look back on and say, this guy was great.
              #1 DRILL SERGEANT PICK-UP LINE

              "You make me hornier before 9 AM than most
              people do all day!"

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              • #8
                Originally posted by jeebee
                quote:
                __________________________________________________
                An under-secretary called him a "moron", but usually they don't
                parrort something like that unless they heard the boss say it first.
                __________________________________________________

                Dr Mordrid is unhappy because someone told to a journalist the well known fact that George W. Bush is a moron.
                I find it interesting how divergent the Franco/German appeasement blocs opinion of this President is vs. those in eastern Europe

                There and in the other parts of the world that remember what it's like to live under a totalitarian government, and who also remember what country helped get them out from under it, American presidents are pretty popular; expecially this one and his predecessor in theology; Ronald Reagan.

                Back when some Germans actually remembered what living under threat was like I seem to remember Reagan being damned popular there when he demanded Gorbachev "tear down this wall". Eventually through the efforts of Reagan, Pope Paul II (LOTS of behind the scenes stuff with him!!) and Lady Thatcher the conditions were ripe for them to throw off those shackles.

                I found it interesting how the Romanians greeted Bush last week when he was welcoming the Vilnius 7 into NATO. I believe I read about ~100,000 cheering him in Romania even though it was raining?

                The Washington Times delivers breaking news and commentary on the issues that affect the future of our nation.


                Dr. Mordrid
                Last edited by Dr Mordrid; 27 November 2002, 07:31.
                Dr. Mordrid
                ----------------------------
                An elephant is a mouse built to government specifications.

                I carry a gun because I can't throw a rock 1,250 fps

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Dr Mordrid
                  American presidents are pretty popular; expecially this one and his predecessor in theology; Ronald Reagan.
                  Dr. Mordrid


                  I don't have much time to respond thoroughly atm (currently atr work, etc) but I have to disagree with your opinion Doc.

                  Bush & co aren't very popular in Europe. Most people here dislike Bush and his ideas.

                  Just some links from several news reports (that I just gatherered in 5 min):

                  500,000 protesters march against war
                  More than half a million anti-war protesters from across Europe marched through Florence at the weekend, singing communist anthems and 1970s peace songs, in a demonstration denouncing any US attack on Iraq.


                  Anti-war protesters take to streets as US faces opposition on two fronts


                  Thousands march in Berlin protest against Bush visit



                  Bush's Europe tour hit by protests
                  View the latest news and breaking news today for U.S., world, weather, entertainment, politics and health at CNN.com.

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Dr Mordrid
                    Lady Thatcher
                    Lady? She ain't no Lady! She stole our school milk!

                    and she's a Baroness by the way
                    DM says: Crunch with Matrox Users@ClimatePrediction.net

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by KeiFront


                      I don't have much time to respond thoroughly atm (currently atr work, etc) but I have to disagree with your opinion Doc.

                      Bush & co aren't very popular in Europe. Most people here dislike Bush and his ideas.
                      And much of the political thought in western Europe is like a moutain sized Swiss cheese: full of holes you could drive a train through.

                      IMHO western Europe has degraded into a PC theocracy more interested in their own little dream-world of late; preferring to obtain financial gain from terrorists like Saddam to getting rid of them in the best interests of everyone, including themselves. They don't seem to remember when the rest of the world, most particularly the US and UK, were working hard at freeing *them* from tyrrany.

                      Nope; no lessons learned in the 20th century there, even though we had to repeat the favor several times

                      Fortunately those states, which I denoted as the Franco-German appeasement bloc, are losing some of their numeric advantage in NATO due to the Vilnius groups support for such efforts. Seems the new democracies *do* remember.

                      Dr. Mordrid
                      Last edited by Dr Mordrid; 27 November 2002, 08:49.
                      Dr. Mordrid
                      ----------------------------
                      An elephant is a mouse built to government specifications.

                      I carry a gun because I can't throw a rock 1,250 fps

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Dr Mordrid

                        I found it interesting how the Romanians greeted Bush last week when he was welcoming the Vilnius 7 into NATO. I believe I read about ~100,000 cheering him in Romania even though it was raining?

                        Dr. Mordrid
                        Romanian people are usually open hearted Doc , Clinton was greeted in the same way, though we didn't get into NATO at that time.
                        Depends on you if you perceive that as something noble or as a sign of weakness (ment to be exploited).
                        And though Bush was warmly greeted, the general feeling amongst people is against the war in Iraq, though not voiced that much. People here are more concerned about their daily life, we're still a "transition" economy.

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                        • #13
                          I'm not even going to comment on your remarks Doc, you only bashed Europe.

                          I was just saying that not everyone backs up Bush plans for a war against Iraq. Even in the US there are people against that war (and some protests).
                          Main: Dual Xeon LV2.4Ghz@3.1Ghz | 3X21" | NVidia 6800 | 2Gb DDR | SCSI
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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Strahd
                            Dr Mordrid I think you mean Canadian Politicians.

                            jeebee
                            Personally, I think that Cretien is doing a great job and I wish he'd be back another term but it looks doubtful. He's the best we've had in a long long time if you ask me.

                            Who wants a straight laced PM or Prez anyway. Cretien's down to earth. I rather a PM that does a face plant playing basket ball. It's things you can look back on and say, this guy was great.
                            What??
                            I don't know of any other world figure that's put his foot in his mouth more than Cretien. I am embarrased to have him as our leader!
                            Yeah, well I'm gonna build my own lunar space lander! With blackjack aaaaannd Hookers! Actually, forget the space lander, and the blackjack. Ahhhh forget the whole thing!

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                            • #15
                              Surely Prince Philip from good old Blighty takes the biscuit here?
                              DM says: Crunch with Matrox Users@ClimatePrediction.net

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