Gurm Update, November (*WARNING* DEPRESSING)

[Gurm]

*sigh*

Disclaimer: If everyone is sick of hearing about me, feel free to skip this thread, or even flame me - I don't care too much.

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So, it is now two months pretty much to the day since I began feeling REALLY ill. And... I seem to have regressed quite a bit, sad to say.

Last weekend, I would have told you differently. Despite having come down with a bit of a cold, I was sleeping solidly, and felt pretty good during the day (as good as one can feel with a head cold).

However, yesterday and today I'm pretty much feeling the same way I did a month and a half ago - not confined to the couch vomiting, but feeling pretty nauseous and run down and "poop"y (yeah, I can't remember how to spell diarrhea (sp?) so sue me).

Of course for the past couple weeks I've woken up each morning, around 6:00 AM (or maybe 6:30) - can't seem to sleep later, except for last weekend when I slept until about 10AM one day!!!

When I wake up I'm not nauseous, but I do have to use the toilet quite specifically, and I'm VERY shivery. In fact as soon as Julie gets out of bed in the morning I tend to be FREEZING. Maybe I should start sleeping in Pajamas, but I sweat profusely during the night. It's this illness, I tell you - making me woozy, dizzy, and COLD in the morning.

And the doctors who claimed that the eye problems and the illness were unrelated are high on crack.

Last weekend, despite the head cold, my eyes were MUCH better - less photosensitive, floaters not so noticeable... and yesterday and today I can barely SEE in low light, and the floaters are right there, blocking my vision.

So whatever the hell this is, it's back. I can only hope this round is shorter than the last one.

And still I have no idea what it is, except that Slougi (was it Slougi) had something similar when he was in LEBANON... leading me to think it MIGHT be some kind of middle-east thing that we here in the states have no antibodies for.

My MRI was fine - apparently I _don't_ have MS or optic nerve damage, or any kind of brain issues. Well, THAT's a plus.

I still have yet to get my ultrasound - abdominal to rule out low-level problems with the gall bladder and/or kidneys.

But at this point, the doctors are somewhat stymied - and so am I. The only thing we HAVEN'T done is a parasite screen, simply because the very first thing we tried for treatment was Flagyl, which ought to kill any parasite... but it was the low dose of Flagyl for only 5 days, so... maybe we need to do a screen. I'll be seeing my doctor next week if this doesn't improve markedly by Monday.

In the meantime, life continues to give me lemons, and without sugar or ice cubes, lemonade is hard to come by.

The BMW overheated the other day... mechanic is still unsure if it's the radiator or something cheaper... in the meantime we are down a car.

And a couple days without Julie has segued into a couple days of her getting stuck in the worst traffic New Jersey has ever seen, and now into a weekend when she has to work in the mornings.

Circuit City turned me down - I mean c'mon, they don't need seasonal salespeople? Jesus!

And tot op it off, Logan is either sick or REALLY moody or both.

So:

- No job
- No wife (most of the day)
- Still sick
- Can't see properly
- Depressed as **** about it all
- Moody sick child

The doctor and others have suggested I might want to see a counselor about the situation. I dunno - do counselors help with depression "for a good reason"? I mean, it's not like I'm depressed for no reason. I'm poor, sick, lonely, and primary caregiver to a demanding 1.5 year old. *sigh*

Uh-oh. Looks like it's time for another trip to the bathroom. Guess I'll sign off.

- Gurm

[Admiral]

The doctor and others have suggested I might want to see a counselor about the situation. I dunno - do counselors help with depression "for a good reason"? I mean, it's not like I'm depressed for no reason. I'm poor, sick, lonely, and primary caregiver to a demanding 1.5 year old. *sigh*

Get over your reluctance (or pride) an try it. Something good might come out of it.
And if you're depressed "for a good reason" what good does it do to you except teach you it's not a good mood and how to get over it in future sittuations.
A councelor will help guide you on doing that.
Give the drugs a rest, though they're a "quick fix" they'll only make you more dependant.
You need a confidant and rest (in the relaxed sense).

[Slougi]

Re: Gurm Update, November (*WARNING* DEPRESSING)

Originally posted by Gurm
And still I have no idea what it is, except that Slougi (was it Slougi) had something similar when he was in LEBANON... leading me to think it MIGHT be some kind of middle-east thing that we here in the states have no antibodies for.

Yep, was me. I had been living in Lebanon for only a year or two prior to that, so it might be that was also a reason it hit me so hard. Had lived in Germany before that, actually grew up there.

The doctor and others have suggested I might want to see a counselor about the situation. I dunno - do counselors help with depression "for a good reason"? I mean, it's not like I'm depressed for no reason. I'm poor, sick, lonely, and primary caregiver to a demanding 1.5 year old. *sigh*

I can't really say, but it is worth a shot, isn't it?


Bad to hear all of this

I just hope you will get better. BTW, I have a 2 ½ year old sister, believe me, they get better when they get 2 :P At 1 ½ years I couldn't stand her

[Gurm]

Logan is a sweet sweet boy, he really is. The last week or two he has been sick though. Half my problem is that this head cold just WILL NOT QUIT, in either me or him. We got it from a friend, and HE still has it, two weeks later. It's just one of those colds - first couple days feels like a regular cold, but the cough and stuffiness and bloated head feeling just LINGERS.

The disorientation is getting irritating, too. Hard to concentrate, hard to get anything DONE. *sigh*

I guess I need to get back to the doctors though. It sucks because "managed care" is so impersonal. They have 15 minutes with me, so I go in, they say "let's run tests X,Y, and Z", and then it's "come back in a week".

Bleh.

- Gurm

[Lizzard[MPE]]

have any time to meditate J?

[Gurm]

Liz,

Yeah, I'm getting to the point where I'm going to try stuff like meditation and/or Yoga. I play my guitar, but that's not QUITE the same.

Slougi,

Remind me - you said the initial symptoms of your malady lasted a couple weeks (same as mine, only yours were more severe)... how long did the general "yuckiness" every day last? Couple months? Longer? Less? Help me out here.

- Gurm

[Slougi]

Originally posted by Gurm
Slougi,

Remind me - you said the initial symptoms of your malady lasted a couple weeks (same as mine, only yours were more severe)... how long did the general "yuckiness" every day last? Couple months? Longer? Less? Help me out here.

- Gurm

The sickness itself lasted for around 2 weeks +- a few days, i can't quite remember. I felt "drained" (dunno how to really describe it, but you know what I mean, similar symptoms) for around 3 weeks after that too.

[mutz]

I lived and traveled in Asia (and still do) and have had a number of parasites. We always took Flagyl in high doses in one shot to kill 'em dead. Lower doses over longer is more likely to make them resistant. Untreated, parasites can travel anywhere in the body and cause all sorts of problems. Stool tests are absolutely necessary, and must be carried out by the book. Samples should be taken from the second stool. Get some thorough testing.

And on counseling, especially since your whole household is affected/involved, I would highly recommend it. The trick is to find a good counselor/shrink/therapist. Somebody experienced and MODERN. Just because somebody has a degree or a certificate doesn't prevent him/her from being a nut/quack/nazi/la-tee-da. Actually a woman is preferable, in that women are more intuitive and realistic.

I work with people with all different kinds of problems and I know that problems don't come alone and are related to each other, sometimes in obscure ways. And when you go to work on one, others may wake up too. It's important that you be open to any possibilities, particularly if you find a good "counselor" who tells you what you DON'T want to hear. Bite the bullet and go for broke, you have nothing to lose.

[KvHagedorn]

If you are no longer on the meds and this is still happening, I would guess parasite too, especially from what you describe. The Flagyl probably retarded their reproduction but allowed a more resistant strain to re-emerge. Parasitic waste products can have adverse neural effects like you are seeing, I believe, essentially poisoning you. Don't let a medical degree fool you.. lots of docs aren't competent or simply don't give a damn. Since medicine has become such a high income profession, a lot of these guys are just there to get rich.

[Indiana]

Nice to hear that the MRI was negative, especially no sings of optical neuritis / MS (this very often starts with strange visual symptoms).

I'd do the parasite check as it sounds like a probable reason.

But then there is the annoying fact that there still are diseases that can't really be found a striking reason for. Hope it's not one of those and if it is then I hope it'll settle by itself soon.

[Dogbert]

Parasite seems logic to me too.
Anyway, feel better soon Gurm, and if possible, try to take a trip with the family to somewhere warmer. (here it's still summer temperatures so I guess there's some crazy weather on some parts of the U.S as well).

[Gurm]

Yeah, I'm tempted to think parasite as well.

My initial symptoms began about a week or 10 days after my anniversary - and on the NIGHT of our anniversary we both got food poisoning at a Japanese restaurant where we had filet mignon and shrimp on the barbecue table. Julie's steak was well done, mine was rare... which might have made the difference. We're pretty sure it was the shrimp that gave us the screaming liquishits, but I think it may have been the steak that affected me.

It was about a week (give or take) later that I started to experience the initial outbreak of this disease.

But yes, this is somewhat similar to the outbreak of Giardia I had 3 years ago. Ill in the morning mostly... much better after lunch (although I'm not as MUCH better after lunch as I was with the Giardia). Wakes me up in the morning feeling a little ill and VERY shaky.

And yeah, the cyclic nature of it is very indicative of a parasite too.

I think I will call the doctor and insist on a parasite screen "by the book", meaning taking the second stool sample of the day for 3 days straight. (I think that's the "by the book" method, yeah?)

And I want another Lyme disease screen as well, although it PROBABLY isn't Lyme...

Now the question is if they DO find a parasite, will the higher dose of Flagyl all in one shot do the trick? I hope so.

- Gurm

[Gurm]

By the way - although I am a crotchety person online, I want you all to know how much your support and advice means to me. Until such time as I can get to see a counselor, y'all are the next best thing.

- Gurm

[Wombat]

It sounds highly unlikely that it's Lyme. I grew up in South Jersey, and you don't sound like any of the cases I remember (I was in high school when it really exploded there, and it was hard/impossible to kill). You've got some of the symptoms (sweats, digestive, floaters, others), but if you had Lyme you'd probably be complaining of pain/nerve issues, arthrithic/tendonitis, cardio or respiratory stuff.

[Gurm]

Yeah, I know Wombat. I had some joint pain back in the early summer, but none recently. *shrug*

My pulse has been high since early summer as well. But again, not so high as to make anyone worried - and I've always had a high pulse.

- Gurm