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Monday chuckles

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  • Monday chuckles

    1. Cannot find REALITY.SYS. Universe halted.
    2. Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.
    3. Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are.
    4. My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.
    5. C:\WINDOWS C:\WINDOWS\GO C:\PC\CRAWL
    6. C:\DOS C:\DOS\RUN RUN\DOS\RUN
    7. <-------- The information went data way --------
    8. Best file compression around "DEL " = 100% compression
    9. The Definition of an Upgrade Take old bugs out, put new ones in.
    10. BREAKFAST.COM Halted...Cereal Port Not Responding
    11. The name is Baud......, James Baud.
    12. Access denied-nah nah na nah nah!
    13. C:\> Bad command or file name! Go stand in the corner.
    14. Bad command. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaay..
    15. Why doesn't DOS ever say "EXCELLENT command or filename!"
    16. As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.
    17. Southern DOS: Y'all reckon? (Yep/Nope)
    18. Backups? We don' NEED no steenking backups.
    19. E Pluribus Modem
    20. ... File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)
    21. Ethernet (n) something used to catch the Etherbunny
    22. A mainframe The biggest PC peripheral available.
    23. Does fuzzy logic tickle?
    24. A computer's attention span is as long as its power cord.
    25. 11th commandment - Covet not thy neighbor's system.

    Thought this might pick Ya'll up
    "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." -- Dr. Seuss

    "Always do good. It will gratify some and astonish the rest." ~Mark Twain

  • #2
    My favorite still has to be when computers actually said,

    "Keyboard Error: Keyboard not found. Press F1 to resume"
    Gigabyte P35-DS3L with a Q6600, 2GB Kingston HyperX (after *3* bad pairs of Crucial Ballistix 1066), Galaxy 8800GT 512MB, SB X-Fi, some drives, and a Dell 2005fpw. Running WinXP.

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    • #3
      LOL... Actually, now I have something to chuckle about as I go to bed. I love being a college student... AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

      Enjoy it while it lasts huh?
      McRhea

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      • #4
        Computing terms finally defined (I used to have the whole list):

        State-of-the-art - What your computer is when you buy it.

        Floppy - What your wallet looks like after you buy your state-of-the-art computer.

        Obsolete - What your computer becomes the second you take it out of the box.

        Microsecond - The time it takes your state-of-the-art computer to become obsolete.

        Sytax Error - Telling the computer salesman, "money is no object."

        Keyboard - The obsolete method to generate errors.

        Mouse - The advanced method to generate errors.

        ...

        There are more, I just can't remember them. I'll try and dig them out later.

        Jammrock

        ------------------
        Athlon 650, Biostar board, 128 MB PC133 (Crucial), G400 32 MB DH, SB Live! w/ Digital I/O, 10/100 NIC, lots of case fans, etc...
        “Inside every sane person there’s a madman struggling to get out”
        –The Light Fantastic, Terry Pratchett

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        • #5
          Still one of my favorites (you might have to be middle-aged (sigh) to recognize the song) ... On a clear disk, you can seek forever ....
          <TABLE BGCOLOR=Red><TR><TD><Font-weight="+1"><font COLOR=Black>The world just changed, Sep. 11, 2001</font></Font-weight></TR></TD></TABLE>

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          • #6
            For some really good computery-words and jokes, check this out:
            http://www.tuxedo.org/jargon
            Rob, a great fan of the Aerobed

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